Declaration of Spring

By the power vested in me, I do hereby declare that Spring will begin at 12:01 AM on Monday, March 1, 2010. This will occur whether or not we have 12 inches of snow, zero temperatures, and dissenting opinions of meteorologists, astronomers, astrologists, parapsychologists, English teachers, Ursuline nuns, or Marianist brothers or priests. I don't care what your Mom has told you. This declaration will be valid in the face of any and all naysayers--and spring will last for as long as I say it will. Amen. So Help Me God.